What started out as something simple
by Mangochu
Summary: When Barney falls ill, the gang suspects that all it is is a fever. It's not. Rated T for swearing and slightly mature topics.


_**Could kill you.**_

* * *

McLaren's was abuzz with its usual customers, and a group of four sitting around one of the booths. All had grins on their faces as they drank, not too much, but not too little. Something was amiss though, and concern spread across Robin's face as she noticed how long that they had been sitting here without any stories of getting laid. "Hey, where's Barney?" she asked, hushing all of the groups conversation. Ted looked thoughtful for a a moment.

"I'll call him, hang-" he was cut off as he looked up to see the suited man enter the bar, though. "Never mind," he said, setting down his phone. Ted watched as Barney walked over to them, grinning that one smile that only he could muster. Something about him was off though. He was pale and sweaty, and his breaths were coming in short gasps. If Ted hadn't known better, he would have guessed that Barney had run a marathon. "Sex?" he asked Barney, eyeing him. Barney glanced down at him and laughed.

"Ted, Ted, Ted," he began, his voice catching just a bit, "You know I'm not into you that way, but thanks for coming out buddy," he chuckled. Ted rolled his eyes as Marshall laughed at him. Lily stayed silent. Barney quickly pulled over a chair and sat at the end of the table, coughing into his sleeve harshly. Ted looked at him.

"You okay?" he asked him, and Barney looked up at the question.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I'm fine," he said, clearing his throat, "Just got a tickle," he added, before breaking into a grin. "Want to know what else tickles guys?"

They all graoned in unison.

An hour later, Barney had retold his story of just how he had gotten another hot chic to his apartment, and was about to dive into details when Robin had stopped him, much to his disappointment. After some complaining, they drank a bit, and Barney excused himself to the bathroom. He came out ten minutes later even paler then before, and swaying slightly. Lily looked extremely worried, Ted and Marshall both looked concerned, while Robin waved it off, saying that he had probably drank before he came.

After a while, Barney was asked if he'd like a drink, and it came to their attention that Barney hadn't even spoke of alcohol that night. He nodded. "Yeah, sure," he said, thinking for a moment, "A shot of scotch," he requested. As it arrived he looked at it, almost accusitory, then downed it. Ted was extremely worried by now, usually Barney would be drunk within less then five minutes of being in the bar! Speaking of which, he wasn't hitting on anybody either..

"So, Barney..," Ted began, stopping the man who was about to excuse himself to the bathroom. He sat down uncomfortably.

"Yeah?" he asked, cracking a grin, thought Ted could tell he was anxious.

"Why aren't you hitting on anybody?" he asked, "Also, want another drink? It's on me," he added. Barney was shifting in his chair now, nervously pulling at his tie.

"There's nobody here's..," he paused, paling, "Tonight," he croaked out, staring at the ground. "And no thanks Ted," he breathed, surprising the others.

"Why not?" Ted pushed.

Barney jolted upwards and pushed back his chair, darting towards the restroom, the group watching him with concern.

He returned twenty minutes later this time, swaying on his feet. "I.. have to go..," he breathed as he made it back to the booth. He turned to leave when Lily stepped in front of him.

"You're sick."

"What?!" he gasped, "No, no, no! I don't get sick!" he exclaimed, cracking a grin that didn't quite reach his ears. "When I'm sick, I stop being sick and be awesome instead," he explained, pushing past Robin and turning back to her. "True story," he said, then winked, turning to leave once more. He was stopped by Marshall this time.

"Come on man, spill it," he said. Barney paled, then pushed past others to make a dart for the bathroom once more.

"That was terrible word choice, Marshall," Ted groaned, shaking his head. Marshall chuckled nervously.

This time, when the man returned, he was completely off balance, and nearly collapsed twice on his way back to the others.

"Look guys.. I'm_ fine_..," he muttered, before blacking out and falling to the bars floor.

The light hurt his eyes as he opened them. His head was pounding, and his stomach ached. He groaned, and a loud yell shattered his ears. "He's awake!" somebody.. no.. Ted, yelled.

"Be.. quiet..," Barney groaned, trying to roll over so that his back was facing Ted, but stopping dead at the pain that pierced him at the movement.

"How're you feeling?" he heard Ted ask, softer. The words echoed around his mind for a moment.

"Like shit, what.. happened?" he asked.

"You weren't looking so good, and you kept rushing to the bathroom. We asked you about it and you went to leave, but you blacked out," he explained. This resulted in a groan from Barney.

"Oh, great!" he heard somebody explain. Lily. "He's awake! How's he feeling?" she asked, crouching beside the man and feeling his forehead.

"Like shit..," he repeated, opening his eyes a bit more and struggling to look at Lily and Ted. "Bucket," he breathed, his voice hitching.

"Huh?" Lily asked.

"Bucket. _Now_!" he gasped, and Ted handed him a bucket. Barney retched into it, groaning when he was finished. Lily took the bucket, gingerly, and took it to the Kitchen, wincing as she began to empty the disgusting vile. Something caught her eye.

She rushed out of the kitchen. "Ted."

"Yeah?"

"We're taking him to the Hospital. _Now._" she breathed.


End file.
